The critically acclaimed website urbandictionary.com defines a ‘fuck boy’ as “A boy who plays with girls feelings and doesn’t really like them and would do or say anything a girl wants to hear to have sex with them or to get what they want. A boy who is a player and is only in a relationship for sex.”
Casey Johnson is a fuck boy.
But being a fuck boy is about to pay off for him in a big way. Tonight he will join 23 other fuck boys and three desperate women on a tropical vacation for the first episode of FBoy Island, hosted by Nikki Glaser on HBO Max.
I had the honor and good fortune of meeting Casey when he was a relief pitcher for the hometown Toledo Rockets in 2017. I was able to travel with the team on long road trips to Tennessee, Virginia, Florida, Kentucky and throughout the Midwest. And I’ll be damned if our guy Casey wasn’t swiping right on Tinder, Bumble, Grinder and all the other dating apps the second we got into the new city.
Now I’ll admit, I wasn’t a big fan of Casey during my time with the Rockets. That was mostly due to his inability to throw strikes out of the bullpen. I remember one game we were at Michigan State, he came into the game late, threw eight-straight balls and was promptly taken out of the game.
This is going to be incredibly cringeworthy. But I’ve got my HBO Max subscription ready for tonight and I’m cheering for CJ. I’m cheering for him to beat cheeks and make as much money as possible. I assume that’s the objective of the game. What else could it be?
P.S. I fucking love Nikki Glaser. She’s one of my favorite comedians on the planet. On the zero percent chance that she reads this… Sup girl? Hit me up. Definitely not a fuck boy.