Damnit, who typed a question mark on the teleprompter? For the last time, anything you put on that promoter Burgundy will read!

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For real though, there’s no worst place for a punter to be standing than the goal line thinking to yourself, “Don’t shank it, don’t shank it.” It’s our absolute worst nightmare. Which leads me to the events that took place tonight in prime time Thursday Night Football.

The no namer that the Titan’s has just recently brought in to be their 3rd punter in three straight weeks was backed up in his own end zone hoping to flip the field and give the defense some sort of field position. Butttttt that little birdie in his ear became too loud and.. well I’ll let the video speak for itself.

Sheeeesh. All too many times I’ve felt this pain. The instant that ball hit your full extended/pointed foot and you know it’s not going anywhere. And then the trot over to the sideline with your head down anticipating an ass chewing of a lifetime. Tough to bounce back from that especially when the opposing teams punches it in the end zone quickly. Those are our points.

Hey, you can’t get to low on your mishaps and you can’t get to high on your massive kicks. Got to bounce back. Your gonna be back on that field. Clear your mind and pray that the next possession isn’t a three and out. Get a couple first downs and let’s make this a punt in. Nice end over end one.

Jesus Murphy! Poor guy got trotted out on the field way to quickly after that shank. I can guarantee he was thinking how shitty it was going to be to have to watch the previous punt tomorrow in the film room that he forgot to practice his drops on the sideline. Which leads to you getting to “pretty” with it that you forget to get a quick get off time. Have to work like a well oiled machine. We have a few loose parts here.

Now this leads to the question. I should prolly try out to be the 4th new punter in 4 straight weeks for the Tennessee Titian’s, right?

Yeah, no, I totally would. Don’t get me wrong. Sounds like a solid gig. But… I uhh I got oblos

(Oblos = Obligations)